“Surround yourself with people who provide you with support and love and remember to give back as much as you can in return.” Karen Kain
One of the most important things you can have when you are trying to recover from grief is the love and support of people who care about you. After my experiences with grief, I am convinced that the only way we survive is by supporting each other.
When my daughter died on September 11, 2001, in the plane crash into the Pentagon, I was struck with such numbing shock and grief that I did not know if I could go on. I would not have survived, I believe, without the love and support of three important groups of people.
The first was my family. My husband, son and our extended family drew close to me and lifted me up with their support. Through the days and weeks that followed Asia’s death, I was truly cradled by their strength. Although each member of our family was individually overcome with grief, together we formed a net that gave each other the support to get through those difficult days.
The second group was my church family. Our pastor, friends and supportive members gave us the help we needed when it was all just too much to bear. Asia’s memorial service was a testament to the dedication of these people, with tributes speaking of her impact on their lives touching us and making the grief more manageable. Today, these same people still love and support us, and I love them for the help they have given and continue to give.
Finally, in Asia’s death, we discovered that millions of people all over the globe united with us in sorrow and shared our loss. This third group of people, the citizens of the world, was an unexpected gift of support in our grieving process. Unlike the parents of some children who are taken too soon, Asia’s death was shared by the world because of the manner in which she died. To this day, people remember her and offer us condolences.
These three groups of people surrounded us with love and support. During the grief process, having this support network is so important. Do not turn away from those who want to help you in your own grief process.